Exactly one year has passed since I walked away from the job that once brought me fulfillment. We had outgrown each other. I remember closing the door inside the building for one final time, walking to my car, getting inside and taking a deep exhale. So this is what Whitney Houston was talking about.
Sometimes you’ll laugh, sometimes you’ll cry. Life never tells us, the when’s or why’s. When you’ve got friends, to wish you well, you’ll find your point when you will exhale.
For what felt like four years of suffocation, I could freely breathe. As the gate opened outside and I drove onto the highway, metaphorically I began to ponder where my next stop would be, what paths I’d cross again and if I would indeed be okay. At the time, my only certainty was the fact that I knew I didn’t have to be at work again at 1:00 a.m. on Monday morning. Other than that, I was embarking on a journey as a semi-beginner freelancer. I’d saved up a year’s worth of rent and didn’t know I’d burn through it in less than eight months. The friends I once relied on for strength would make their soon-to-be departures. And, my fight with faith would be a soon 12-round knockout I hadn’t exactly trained for.
One thing was for certain, I had finally vindicated myself from the opinions from others. I had lived much of my adult life pondering about how my decisions would impact those around me and whether or not I was doing “the right thing” according to their standards.
Yeah, I cut that out real quick.
[Tweet “My biggest concerns in life are pleasing God and how much money I should be spending on me.”]The last year has come with much reflecting and spending time on who/what matter the most. My last day of working as a news producer, I celebrated it by going home and going to sleep. I was tired and emotionally drained.
Note: I do have a real job. Don’t think your tax dollars are paying for me to travel across the country. My grind has hit 1,000 just to afford my lifestyle. So don’t quit your job without a real source of income and say Girl Tyler inspired you. You’ll be broke. Trust me.
This year, I spent my 1-year-of-stepping-out-on-faith-aversary in Hollywood channeling the wondrous contributions of those before me.
Last night in Hollywood at Debbie Allen's star. #TourdeTyler #countrygirlinLA pic.twitter.com/1MbooERAz6
— GirlTyler (@sheistyler) June 27, 2016
As for the last 365 days…
I traveled.
Met great thinkers.
Hello, Black men. #GirlTyler #EmpowerHer16 @marquelleturner @ajthegent
A photo posted by Girl Tyler (@sheistyler) on
Spent time with those I admire, even if it was just for a minute.
Acquired new skills.
A photo posted by Girl Tyler (@sheistyler) on
Hugged a little tighter.
Took extended breaks.
A photo posted by Girl Tyler (@sheistyler) on
Allowed my inner child to play more.
And traveled some more, to places I never thought possible.
Sunday. #TourdeTyler #countrygirlinLA
A photo posted by Girl Tyler (@sheistyler) on
Most importantly, I allowed my heart to smile.
If I were writing my autobiography today, the last line would read, “And she lived.”
When I am asked for advice from individuals seeking to break free from their current job situation, I have four big reminders to share. Because I am still new to the game and haven’t arrived at my goals, I can only tell you what I know to be true.
4. Reserve your ideas for great people.
Stop telling your big ideas to small-minded people. When shit hits the fan or if you fail to deliver, they will be the first ones waiting at your doorstep ready to hit you with negativity. Enjoy the recreation of social media, and giving up a piece of yourself for all to see. It’s how we connect. BUT, be mindful that there is a hating section at your life concert checking your profile daily, waiting for you to fall flat on your face. Get excited about your big ideas, but only share them when there is clear execution. I have a personal executive team for my creativity that include my career coach, best friend and mentor. They always give me the real deal and necessary feedback on how to proceed with making my ambitions a reality. Find yours. Align yourself with likeminded individuals.
3. Take inventory of your time.
Everything happens in its season, but be mindful of how you utilize your time. I’ve had many great experiences in the last year and wouldn’t go back on any of them, even the not so great ones. Calculate how much time you spend cumulatively in one day sending gossipy text messages, scrolling on Facebook, tweeting your unsolicited opinions and stalking bae that is not bae on Instagram. Multiply it by seven. The sum is how much time you could have been dedicating to your passion in one week. The same goes for TV consumption. Anything can happen in one year. For the things that didn’t happen the way you wanted them to, you can likely attribute it to how you’ve spent your time.
Working on yourself can be a daunting task, don’t get lazy on you. Put in the time.
2. Screw your plans.
Once you’ve decided to chase your heart’s desires, good luck with thinking everything will go according to plan. I’ve taken quite a few hits in the last year. Agreements not being honored. Cheated out of money. Car troubles. Part-time job fizzling out. The list goes on and on. But I’ve had a tight support system on rainy days and not once did my faith waiver or did I question whether I made the right decision resigning from my full-time job. No matter your belief system, you must believe that your breakthrough is right around the corner. Elevation comes right when you’re about to quit.
1. So what if they don’t like you?
You’ll send out your resume. Pitch ideas. Leave countless voicemails and still you’ll be ignored. You know you’re worthy of a breakout role, but no one else seems to want to take a chance on you. It’s like that sometimes. Networking has become a pretentious skill where most people will only want to get to know you if you have something to offer them and nothing less. What’s talent? I’m a proponent of getting to know people for the sake of getting to know people. We all have interesting stories as we hit the road of endless diverging paths. You never know when you’ll need someone later in life. While it may be difficult finding the right connections or getting the attention of those who can give you your big break, no encounter is a mistake. You’ll have those full circle moments where the people who you needed most at one time are now coming to you for help. Be kind anyways. Remember: “always business, never personal“. The greatest advice I’ve received about success always involves being yourself. No one can ever fault you for that.
Pray without ceasing, even on your good days, pray some more. Stay strong. Keep pushing until the necessary muscles required to flex are strong enough to show the world what you’re capable of.
So what’s next for Girl Tyler?
I aspire to be the Norman Lear with melanin and breasts.
I don’t know where I’m going next, but I promise it won’t be boring.
Amazing journey! Good things happen to those that waut, but freaking awesome things happen for those who go for it in faith!
Congratulations on the progression of your journey! Really inspiring to a blogging newbie like be 🙂
ALL LOVE,
Cam
TheCamKWay.com
Congratulations on the progression of your journey! Really inspiring to a blogging newbie like me 🙂
ALL LOVE,
Cam
TheCamKWay.com
Thank you so much! I really appreciate your support of my blog and events. You are such a great talent and great ball of energy, I absolutely love seeing you growth as a blogger. You have such great ambition and innovation, that is truly breathtaking. Glad to have you in my corner! Continued success to you 🙂
Tyler,
What a wonderful read. Thank you for sharing your story. I can relate to a lot of your experiences. For me, it has been a long journey of building up my brand, ‘Flow Of wisdom’ (which is a syndicated talk radio show). Now my focus is to expand the company and I’m making some progress. I will subscribe and hopefully we will connect, network and or mastermind!
Sean Anthony
Thank you so much Sean for taking the time to read my blog! As I move deeper into my purpose, I realize most of my experiences are universal to other individuals seeking more for themselves. We’re all in this together! Best of luck to you and I am most definitely looking forward to connecting.
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